Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
