Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
