Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize