He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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