I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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