If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
