That's when you crack a 10am beer
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
They took my balls.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
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