dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
