Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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