i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize
