my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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