Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize