i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
