HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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