We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize