I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
