Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
