I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Randomize
