And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
