dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
