Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
