He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
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