Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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