for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
