Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
