names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Randomize
