we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
