Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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