why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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