That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
