I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
