Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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