Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
