Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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