Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
