Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Me too!
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Hippo gnu deer
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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