idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
