will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
