We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
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