left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
