Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
