you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
