Buhtt sex?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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