Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
