I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize