Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
