I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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