He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I did not marry a roomba.
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