Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
