So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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