Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
high people should be assigned attendants
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
