if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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