We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Girls should come with a carfax report
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
